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skyrimkinkmemeANNOUNCEMENTS: UPDATED 12/16/2017
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Nightshade and Juniper 19.1
Date: 2013-07-09 09:07 pm (UTC)Relationship: het
Kinks/warnings: hurt/comfort, angst, vanilla comfort sex
Summary: It's time for Kaie's funeral and Liriel's there to help Madanach through it. But Madanach's not just a father mourning a daughter, he's a king who's lost his heir, and the consequences for Liriel are nothing short of devastating...
A/N: OK, the writer's block is broken. I could hardly leave you all hanging after that ending, could I? Don't put the tissues away though, this chapter's also rather emotional.
Not a word from Madanach as Liriel led him back to his tent. Not a word as she led him to the bed and laid him down on it, letting her undress him, unresisting and silent, eyes dead inside, and that was what scared her the most, the silence. Rage, tears, she could have handled all those, but this just wasn't like him. She remembered Argis telling her how Madanach had just given in and surrendered to the Nords after they killed Eithne and she couldn't picture it at the time... but now she saw it perfectly. His little girl was dead and nothing else mattered. Now it had happened again, and something inside had died with Kaie. Liriel hoped it wouldn't be permanent... but he'd been twenty years younger when Eithne died, still had a cause to fight, still had three other daughters and Argis. Now... it didn't look good but Liriel had to hope.
She shed her own clothes, pleased to note a flicker of something in his eyes as he watched her – not entirely dead then. He reached out to her as she slid into the bed alongside him, pulling her into his arms and kissing her with as much ferocity as he always had. Then he let her go, going limp in her arms and shuddering quietly.
“I can't... you're beautiful but I can't... I'm sorry...”
“Don't,” Liriel whispered, holding him to her, caressing his back and kissing his forehead. “It's alright. You just lost your daughter, you don't have to...”
Madanach just shook his head, clinging on to her and crying quietly. Tears in her own eyes, Liriel held him, pulling the covers over them both, holding him close until he finally fell asleep.
~~~~~~~~~~
Hours later and Liriel woke up to find Madanach spooning with her from behind, erection pressed up against her as he kissed her neck.
“Cariad,” he breathed into her ear. “Cariad, we killed Ulfric.”
Liriel closed her eyes as his hand slid up to her breast and while she wanted to, oh gods, she wanted to, she wasn't sure this was such a good idea. On the other hand, him taking pleasure in anything was an improvement, surely?
“We did,” she whispered, turning to face him and she knew as soon as she saw his face that he'd not forgotten who else had died either, but he needed to feel something, anything, and better her than Skooma, she supposed.
“Please,” he murmured, placing little kisses on her cheek. “Please, let me... I need to... need you...”
“All right,” Liriel whispered, leaning back and letting him crawl on top of her. Madanach moaned her name as he slid a hand between her legs and Liriel closed her eyes, gasping as fingers touched and caressed her gently, a lot more gently than she was used to from him. He was whispering her name, forehead pressed to hers, shivering as she pressed him to her and then his fingers left her and he was inside her, moaning as he moved, holding on to her and saying her name like a litany, a chant against ill luck, a plea to a goddess who might be able to heal him.
Even a Dragonborn Archmage Listener's power had limits. But she'd do what she could. She let him fuck her, crying out as he moved inside her, kissed him as if their lives depended on it, and if it was gentler sex than they usually had, it was no less emotionally charged.
“Love you,” Madanach whispered in her ear, sounding as if his heart was breaking. “Love you so much, will always love you, Liriel, oh Liriel.”
“Madanach,” Liriel gasped, closing her eyes. “Love you too.”
He cried out as he came, thrusting inside her before collapsing in her arms, shaking and clinging to her. Liriel held on to him, soothing him as best she could.
Re: Nightshade and Juniper 19.2
Date: 2013-07-09 09:09 pm (UTC)“No. Of course not. Kaie...” He stopped, choking back a sob and it was some moments before he could finally speak again.
“Thank you,” he told her. “For this. For everything. For my kingdom. For loving me. For talking me into seeing sense over Argis. Thank you.” He kissed her, putting what felt like all the passion he'd ever felt into it, then lay back, seeing fading daylight outside and guessing sunset wasn't far off.
“Well then,” he said, trying to sound matter-of-fact and failing horribly. “I suppose we'd better go lay my daughter to rest.” He covered his eyes, looking away, taking a moment to compose himself, before finally getting out of bed. Someone had left a bowl of water and clean towels for them while they'd slept and Madanach cleaned himself and got dressed without a word. Liriel followed, pulling on her Shrouded Robes, the hood down out of respect. She'd brought enough death in them before now, may as well attend a funeral in them.
“Should warn you, it could go on a while,” Madanach told her. “Kaie was a popular girl.”
“I don't mind,” said Liriel quietly, wrapping her arms around him from behind as they stared out at the western horizon. Madanach placed a hand over hers, squeezing it tight.
“You'll be there, won't you?” he asked, and Liriel hated hearing him sound that needy and plaintive. She'd always loved his strength and confidence, even in the face of adversity – to hear him like this now broke her heart.
“I'm not going anywhere,” Liriel whispered, kissing him on the cheek. She got a sad little smile in response to that.
“Come on,” Madanach said, taking her hand and leading her out. “Let's go see off my daughter.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Torches had been lit at the corners of Kaie's pyre – her body was laid out on a heap of wood, cleaned up, wounds sewn shut, arrayed in her Forsworn gear, weapons replaced with wood and stone Forsworn gear – presumably her ebony and glass ones were considered a bit too valuable to send to the afterlife with her. Argis and Cicero were still there, Argis looking pale and exhausted with shadows under reddened eyes, and Cicero sitting next to him, eyes wide and fixed grin on his face despite the tears glittering on his cheeks.
“Listener, Listener, they came and tended to sweet Kaie, doesn't she look lovely, Listener?” Cicero babbled, and probably only the tears rolling down his face saved him from Madanach trying to strangle him – as it was, Madanach sank into one of the two empty seats at Kaie's head, shutting his eyes and hiding his face.
“Yes she does,” said Liriel softly. Kaie had never been the type for pretty dresses or femininity – life as a Forsworn warrior had left little time for that. But she was attractive and if you just looked at her face, you could be forgiven for thinking she was just sleeping – if you ignored the stitching lower down and the blood already mottling her back and arms. She gave Cicero a hug, whispered for him to be quiet during the ceremony and went to sit next to Madanach. All across the morgue, torches were being lit, highlighting the Reach's war dead laid out to rest.
“They'll all be having their rites tonight,” Madanach murmured. “But one of the perks of being king is that we get to go first.” Hollow laugh at that.
“What happens?” Liriel whispered, as a queue of mourners started to form, starting with people Liriel recognised from Druadach Redoubt but stretching back into the distance. Madanach hadn't been wrong, Kaie had been a popular girl.
“We wait... and then everyone in turn comes up to pay their respects, they say how they knew her, and share something, a memory, a story, something they learned, anything, and then they cast a flower petal over her.” Madanach indicated three baskets of flowers by the pyre, and many of the mourners had brought their own. “Hope you've got something to say, cariad, you're fourth.”
“Fourth??” Liriel whispered, starting to panic. What was she supposed to say, she'd not known Kaie that long! Not long enough to share stories or build memories. Mara help her. Still, the words would come from somewhere. They usually did.
Re: Nightshade and Juniper 19.3
Date: 2013-07-09 09:11 pm (UTC)The drumbeat that had been going continuously since Cicero had carried Kaie's bloodied form into the camp and those held in reserve realised what had happened rang out three more times and then stopped. Down in the valley, mourners stood by their own kin, but all looked expectantly up to where Kaie had been laid. Madanach closed his eyes, took a deep breath and then got to his feet, surveying the crowd.
“I hope you're not expecting a speech to echo down through the ages, because I didn't prepare anything,” he said gruffly, and that did get a small ripple of sympathetic laughter. Madanach smiled tightly in acknowledgement, before staring down at Kaie.
“No one should have to prepare themselves for their child's death,” he said, carefully kneeling down next to her, placing a hand on her shoulder and bracing himself.
“I knew Kaie ap Madanach,” he announced, voice carrying across the silent plain. “She was my daughter...” He stopped, taking a second to compose himself. Finally, he pulled himself together and continued. “She was my daughter and my heir, although she was never meant to be. She had two older sisters once, but the Nords took them from us and I never got to say goodbye. She did though and I know she missed them horribly. She was never supposed to be heir, but she rose to the challenge magnificently. She would have made such a good queen...” Here Madanach had to stop again, wiping tears away but he quickly rallied. “She was an invaluable source of support while I was in prison, my lifeline to the outside world. And afterwards she took care of me like a mother and nagged at me like a wife to go to bed at normal hours, eat properly, get some fresh air. I could never have done any of this without her being there.” Madanach stroked her face, trying to recall happier times. Too many and they all made him cry, but he knew what did need to be said. “She was one of the best and bravest we had, but I remember her before all that. I remember the midwife placing her in my arms at Karthspire and being told congratulations, you've got another healthy girl, and I remember seeing her there, so tiny and helpless and mine to look after and protect and I swore I'd take care of her, protect her with my life if I had to. Then I ended up in prison and never could... and now...” Madanach lowered his head, forehead pressed to Kaie's, giving up on the whole not crying business because it was clearly doomed. “M'inyeen, I'm sorry. So sorry. I love you...” He stayed there for a few moments before giving her one last kiss on the forehead, reaching for the flower basket and scattering a few petals from the blue mountain flowers over her, then retreating to rejoin Liriel, head in his hands as he wept silently, leaning into Liriel as she held him.
“See, told you you could come up with things off the cuff and make them sound amazing,” she whispered to him.
“I'd trade it for witless idiocy if it brought my daughter back,” Madanach said softly. Then Argis got to his feet, pale, exhausted, but doing this for his sister if it killed him.
“I knew Kaie ap Madanach,” he began nervously, glancing at Madanach as if for permission to continue. Madanach just smiled faintly and nodded for him to go on. Argis drew a breath and continued.
“She was my sister,” he finally said out loud, and if that drew a little ripple from the crowd who'd not entirely believed it until now, Argis ignored it. “And my friend. I used to sneak her in to see Da while he was inside. She didn't know I was her brother, but I did and I looked out for her as best I could. She -” and here he stopped, biting his lip and blushing a little. “Oh gods, this is embarrassing.”
“Yes, but is it funny?” Cicero queried from next to him. Argis laughed and ruffled his hair.
“Yeah, but – ah Void it, I'm saying it anyway, she can't hit me now. All right. Kaie always noticed how nice I was to her, how gentlemanly, and while she knew I was part-Reachman and loyal to the cause, she didn't know who'd fathered me and made assumptions. One night as I was seeing her out, she tried to kiss me.”
Re: Nightshade and Juniper 19.4
Date: 2013-07-09 09:12 pm (UTC)“Oh, it gets better,” Argis promised, grinning. “Obviously I had to turn her down, and she looked really confused and wanted to know why, and I had to tell her something. So, er, I told her I preferred men.”
Cicero actually shrieked at this point, falling back on the ground, howling in delight. Liriel was only just managing not to laugh, then she made the mistake of catching Madanach's eye. He looked at her, began to smile, and then began to laugh, wiping tears away but tears of delight this time. Liriel took his hand and finally let herself smile.
“It gets even better than that,” Argis grinned. “Clearly once I'd told her that, she wanted details and every time I saw her she'd ask how I was, if I was seeing anyone, and to keep her from getting suspicious, I ended up inventing a fake boyfriend in the guards. He was a tall, blonde Nord a bit older than me called Sven and...” He stopped, seeing that both Madanach and Liriel had lost it completely by this point and Cicero was actually having hysterics on the ground. Argis had to laugh himself.
“Yes,” he admitted. “I lied to my own sister over a period of years, spinning an entire fictitious love life to throw her off the scent. She consoled me through three break-ups, squealed with me over several new love affairs, and believed me when I told her that due to the beliefs Nords had over sex and marriage, no one must ever know or I'd lose my job and not be able to help her and Da any more. Then after nearly two decades of this, Da finally mans up and tells her the truth, and next thing I know she's down there in Markarth and the first thing she does is hit me. Entirely deserved, and I am just fortunate she forgave me and that she knew before she died.”
Everyone in hearing distance had broken down in laughter by this point, and Madanach had the grace to look guilty over the whole thing.
“I am so very sorry, son,” he finally said when he'd recovered himself. “I had no idea. You're right, I should have told her years ago.”
“Damn right you should, I was starting to believe it myself after a bit!” Argis cried. “I ended up heartbroken over men who never existed!”
That set Madanach and indeed everyone else off again, and Liriel sat back, watching Madanach actually smile again, and began to realise why the Forsworn did this – to remember the good times and laugh over them. Finally the laughter subsided and Argis turned his attention back to Kaie, face falling.
“Thanks, sis. Thanks for listening all that time and being a good friend, and for not actually killing me when you found out the truth. I miss you.” He kissed her on the cheek and reached for some purple mountain flowers, scattering a couple of petals over her and retreating, stopping by Madanach and Liriel.
“Are you alright?” he asked quietly, looking at Madanach. He nodded, still trying not to laugh.
“Oh you're my son all right,” Madanach said fondly. “Inventing an entire love life and keeping the story going for fifteen years, and convincing Kaie of all people who is no fool...” He stopped, eyes falling on Kaie's form again and his smile fading. “Was no fool,” he corrected, hand over his eyes again.
“Da,” Argis whispered. “Da, you don't need to be here for all of it...”
“Yes I do,” said Madanach quietly. “Go on, go, I had a couple of bedrolls and a tent put up just behind us for you and Cicero. You kept watch all day, now it's my turn.”
Argis nodded and went in search of said bedroll. Liriel had a feeling he'd be back before the end, but she had to agree, he needed sleep. With Argis gone, next up was Cicero, who crawled forward, nervously crouching by Kaie's pyre.
“Cicero hopes no one is expecting him to top that,” he said, licking his lips. “Cicero doesn't have stories of fake love affairs and sexual exploits – he has a lot of real ones, but doesn't think they'd be appropriate.” He shot a nervous glance at Madanach who had narrowed his eyes but motioned for him to get on with it.
Re: Nightshade and Juniper 19.5
Date: 2013-07-09 09:13 pm (UTC)“They hit her with their battle-axes and she fell to the ground and... and Cicero went for them. Cicero stabbed them, all of them, he doesn't really remember it but there was blood, lots of it! And then they were dead and Cicero ran to Kaie but she'd lost too much blood and she just gasped my name. I told her to hang on, I'd find a healer, but she just gasped “Tell Da... sorry...” and closed her eyes. So Cicero picked her up and carried her out of the city back to camp but by the time he got here she'd... she'd gone.”
Everyone had gone silent on hearing this, tears on most cheeks, and Liriel guessed this was the first time he'd told this to anyone. Madanach was bent over, head in his hands, not even moving. Cicero leaned closer to her, lips brushing her cheek, tears rolling from his eyes.
“Cicero is sorry, sweetling!” he wept. “Cicero failed you! Cicero should have been tending to you, watching you and... Cicero should have saved you and he didn't! And now you're in the Void and Cicero misses you! You were kind to me! Nice to me! And now you're gone.” He dried his eyes and kissed her lips once. “Goodbye, sweetling,” he whispered. “You are in the Void now, with your sisters, and Cicero shall pray to the Night Mother to look after you. You killed lots and lots of people in your time, I'm sure she'll like you. And when Cicero dies, maybe he'll see you again. That would be nice. Cicero... Cicero would like that...” Unable to say any more, Cicero scattered some red mountain flowers over her and fled to where Liriel was sitting, curling up at her feet in tears.
“I'm sorry!” he sobbed. “Cicero is sorry!”
Liriel reached down and cuddled him. Of course he blamed himself. The last one to see her alive, and if he'd got her to a healer in time, who knew. Probably not terribly likely it would have made a difference – Kaie's wounds had looked deep.
“Cicero,” Liriel whispered, trying to comfort him. “It wasn't your fault.”
Cicero just howled harder and then to Liriel's surprise, Madanach reached out and patted his shoulder.
“It's not your fault, boy,” Madanach said gruffly, not looking at Cicero. “Thank you... thank you for bringing her back.”
Cicero detached himself from Liriel, flinging himself at Madanach who to Liriel's absolute amazement, actually cuddled him back while Cicero wailed all over him.
Finally Cicero subsided and Madanach lifted his head up to look at him.
“You avenged my daughter and brought her home. You ever need anything, be it a favour or just company, you can come see me at Understone Keep any time, understand?”
Cicero nodded, still sniffling. Madanach gave the faintest smile as he brushed Cicero's tears away.
“I name you blood-brother,” he said casually, as if it was no big deal, people just earned this honour every day. “Blood of my blood, whoever harms you harms me.”
Re: Nightshade and Juniper 19.6
Date: 2013-07-09 09:15 pm (UTC)“Of course you can accept, Cicero,” she told him. Cicero squeaked and cuddled Madanach's legs.
“Yes, yes, of course, of course!” Cicero squealed. “Cicero shall be Madanach's blood-brother and if Madanach needs anyone discreetly stabbing, anyone at all, he need only ask and Cicero shall see the matter dealt with immediately!”
Madanach chuckled, patting Cicero's cheek. “Not the traditional response, but it's close enough. Go on, go find Argis, get some sleep. You look like you need it.”
Cicero nodded, getting to his feet, a cuddle for Madanach and then another for Liriel, before scampering off for a nap. Looking at the rest of the mourners all awaiting their turn, Liriel had a feeling it would be a long night.
And then Madanach patted her hand and told her it was her turn. Oh. Oh gods. Liriel really wasn't sure about this. Too late now though. All eyes were on her and Madanach was looking expectant. Still, it didn't have to be lengthy, did it? Just long enough to say goodbye.
She made her way over, trying to ignore everyone watching her, and knelt by Kaie's side. She had no idea what to say, but she was sure she'd think of something. At least there was the traditional formula to start her off.
“I knew Kaie ap Madanach,” she began. “She was daughter to my lover. She was the first one I saw after getting out of Cidhna Mine, waiting there with all my things and only being a bit sarcastic over the amount of stuff I was carrying. Then I saw her again at Druadach Redoubt and she was pleased to see me, welcomed me in like I was one of her own – and in her eyes, I was. She knew by then Madanach wanted me, she saw the way he changed when I was around, and one of the last things she said to me is that Madanach had been lonely for years and that I'd come along and actually made him smile again, so I pretty much had to marry him, she wouldn't have it any other way. That's who she was to me – the one who loved Madanach as much as I did, the one who took care of him when I couldn't be there, the one who welcomed me into her family and was pleased to see her father happy again. None of us will be the same without her, not her kin, not those of us here today, or those back in the Reach. All the Reach is poorer without her. Rest in peace, Kaie. We'll miss you.”
Hand shaking, she reached into the basket and scattered a couple of jazbay sprigs over Kaie before returning to Madanach's side, slipping into her chair.
“How was I?” she whispered, risking a glance at him. He was watching her and though there were tears in his eyes, he was smiling gently at her. Taking her hand, he squeezed it and kissed her fingers.
Re: Nightshade and Juniper 19.7
Date: 2013-07-09 09:17 pm (UTC)“Now what?” Liriel whispered. Madanach got to his feet, eyes downcast but ready to perform one last fatherly duty.
“Now we say goodbye,” he said roughly, indicating for Liriel to rise too. Everyone got to their feet, although most cleared back from the pyre as Madanach raised his hands to the sky.
“Kaie ap Madanach, Kaie ap Mireen, on this night we commend your soul to the Holy Void, to the embrace of Sithis and the company of your ancestors gone before you, those that have not returned. To the stars above, home of our beloved dead, may another one shine in your name tonight. When we watch the sky on future nights, we will whisper your name, all those who loved you, and know you are watching over us. And when your time comes to return to Anu's realm and rejoin the Dance, we will return with you, and we will know and love and remember you again. From the Void we came, to the Void we return. Dance in starlight, Kaie.”
“Dance in starlight,” came the refrain, and then fire magic crackled in Madanach's hands as he summoned power, raised his hands and then brought them down, the spell firing into the pyre and causing it to blaze into life. All across the valley, others were doing likewise, the sharing for the other war dead having finished a while ago, and only now Kaie's pyre was blazing did others feel it safe to do likewise. The drumbeat started up again, a dull, thudding monotone and somewhere a woman started to sing a lament in a tongue Liriel didn't recognise but it sounded so familiar.
“What's that singing?” she asked, following Madanach as he turned and walked away from the pyre, clearly heading back to camp.
“It's a traditional lament of the Reach for the souls of the dead,” Madanach said quietly. “It's in the old tongue. I'm not translating it or I'll just end up crying again, but it's basically singing the souls of the departed home.”
“To the Void. Where you came from,” said Liriel, looking up at the stars, recalling the words Madanach had lit the pyre with, presumably an old Reach invocation. “It's up there, isn't it, out in the sky. I never thought of it before, but that's like what we believe. The Aedra are up there, Aetherius is out there, that's where our ancestors are. And you think the same.”
Re: Nightshade and Juniper 19.8
Date: 2013-07-09 09:19 pm (UTC)They'd reached the camp by this point, and once inside the gates, the atmosphere shifted, becoming a bit more lively, more like the camps Liriel was familiar with. There were drums, flutes, fiddles in the distance, and a bit nearer, the sounds of at least one couple in a tent having a very good time.
“Are you alright?” Liriel whispered, squeezing Madanach's hand. He looked exhausted and at the end of his resources, but he nodded.
“Yes,” he sighed. “The Dance didn't stop just because Kaie's did. Life goes on, with or without us. I...” He stopped, breathing heavily as he stared at his feet. “Life goes on,” he whispered. He raised his eyes to look at her, haunted, desperate expression in them.
“Liriel, stay with me tonight,” he begged. “Don't leave, don't go, just come to bed with me, make love to me, let me love you any way I can. Please.”
A strange request – where else would she go? - but he'd just lost a loved one, it probably had made him a bit clingier than usual.
“All right,” she whispered, taking his hand in hers. “Let's get you laid.”
~~~~~~~~~~~
They spent the rest of the night making love, Madanach getting creative and getting her off in as many different ways as he could think of. She'd laughed and told him to slow down, they had the rest of their lives together. He'd just smiled sadly and told her no one knew when the Dance would end and so she'd given in and acquiesced to whatever he wanted. Finally they'd collapsed in a heap, exhausted, and Madanach had clung on to her like he was afraid she'd vanish. Liriel had pulled covers over them both and held him, stroking his hair and soothing him until he drifted off to sleep. Then she closed her eyes and soon joined him.
When she woke, it was daylight and the bed was empty. Liriel sat up, immediately casting her eyes about to look for Madanach. Where was he? Should he be left alone right now? Or did he need privacy? He was used to having people around but he was also vulnerable right now.
She needn't have worried. He was still there, up and dressed, sitting at his desk, brooding.
“Madanach?” she called, reaching for her own clothes. “Are you all right?”
He hesitated before answering. “Not really, but it hurts a little less than it did. I don't know if that's a good thing or not. Come, cariad, get dressed, we need to talk.”
Four words that never boded well, and Liriel felt all her hair start to prickle. He sounded gentle enough, but he wasn't looking at her, and all sorts of little signs from the past day started to slot together. She'd chalked it all up to grief... but perhaps it wasn't just Kaie he was mourning.
Liriel pulled her Shrouded Robes on and perched herself on the bed behind him.
“Madanach? What's up? Is something going to happen?”
Re: Nightshade and Juniper 19.9
Date: 2013-07-09 09:21 pm (UTC)“I lost my daughter,” he finally said, still not looking at Liriel. “I'm a father mourning a child. But it's more than that, Liriel. I'm also a king... and with Kaie gone, I don't have an heir.”
Liriel couldn't breathe, couldn't think. She recalled what Argis had said – he was Crown-Prince until a legitimate heir turned up. An heir ready to succeed Madanach in twenty years and all she could give him were Altmer babies who wouldn't even be adults for another fifty and no one in their right mind gave anyone under a hundred any real responsibility.
“But it's all right, I've been thinking about it,” Madanach continued, getting up and joining her on the bed, talking fast, all nervous energy and more than a hint of desperation. “We'll need to get married, soon, and get to working on an heir right away – well, we don't need to wait for the wedding for that. Get you pregnant, get the child born, raise it as best we can – Altmer come of age at fifty, don't they?”
“You're not going to live another fifty years!” Liriel whispered, heart breaking. Madanach had an arm around her, squeezing her hand.
“I know,” he said softly. “But Imperial law allows a wife to inherit her husband's title and land if there's no heir – Elisif did it. You'll rule after me, and you can step down in favour of our child when you feel they're ready. The only other option is Argis and his line, but he's a Nord marrying a Nord and I'm not handing my country back to them in one generation, I'm just not.”
“Madanach...” Liriel began, feeling her pulse race and her blood pound and her head spin. “Madanach, I – I can't...”
“I know it's quicker than you might have wanted but it's the only way, Liriel, please – Liriel?” He'd finally stopped and was looking up at her, going very still as he realised she was shaking all over, tears on her cheeks. “Liriel? What's wrong? I thought you wanted children...”
“You can't have a kingdom of humans ruled by Altmer,” Liriel whispered. “The Thalmor would be all over the place and even if they weren't, everyone else would think they were running the show. It'd be a hundred years before any child of ours was remotely ready to take over, maybe longer. And then they'd live for centuries! I thought the idea was that Reachmen ruled the Reach??”
“Well the Nords saw an end to that, didn't they!” Madanach shouted. “I had four beautiful little girls and I lost them all, one way or another. So I need a legitimate heir and if they can't be full Reach-blooded, I'll settle for half – we're descended from Altmer, it's better than Nord blood.”
“You would give your people a god-king,” Liriel breathed, because she knew that was what would happen, they revered her enough already, give them several generations of the same unageing, undying, golden-skinned ruler? It'd be the Tribunal of Morrowind all over again. Madanach didn't seem to care.
“I don't mind fathering a god,” he said, faint hint of a smirk on his face, and that was so very typical of him, to laugh when he'd not be the one living with it. And it wasn't just the Reach who'd suffer either.
“I mind!” Liriel cried. “If I have a child with you, I can never go home again!”
She stared at him as it hit home – if she had his child, she might as well mourn her parents now. They'd forgive her coming home in forty or fifty years having married a human who'd died – a youthful fling with a human would be ignored, swept under the rug, acted as if it had never happened, everyone made mistakes while young. But a child... a child couldn't be ignored, and she knew exactly what her staunch Thalmor mother would say to a half-blood grandchild.
Re: Nightshade and Juniper 19.10
Date: 2013-07-09 09:23 pm (UTC)“So that's it, is it. I'm not good enough for you, am I? Humans are all right for a little fun, but no true Altmer breeds with one, is that it?”
Oh Kynareth, no, she'd not meant it like that, not at all, she'd do it if it meant that much to him but oh gods, her family... It was a big ask.
“It's not like that, Madanach,” she whispered. “I love you, I'd have a child with you, but... Alinor is home and I'd miss it. Like you'd miss the Reach. My parents can turn a blind eye to a marriage that'll be ended in thirty years, but they'll have to disown me if there's a child.”
Madanach was still looking away, hands shaking and he looked deathly pale. “Don't say it, Liriel. Please don't. Because if you won't do it, I don't have a choice. I need to marry a Reachwoman, and not even one my own age, she'll have to be young and fertile. And while we all know it won't be a love match, you'll have to leave because no queen of the Reach deserves a man who's constantly hankering after his Altmer mistress.”
Liriel's heart cracked in two as reality hit home, the awful truth she'd been repressing since learning of Kaie's death, the reason the pitying looks hadn't just been aimed at Madanach. She couldn't give him an heir, not really, and if not her, someone else would need to. She'd just lost him for good.
Dissolving into tears, she began to cry, heartfelt sobbing, howling her grief out that after everything it had come to this, that she'd been so happy, loved him so much and she could never have him, they could never give each other what they needed.
“Don't,” he was saying, sounding as miserable as she did, taking her in his arms and cradling her against him, raining kisses all over her hair. “Don't cry, cariad, I love you, we can do this, please, please have my child, please, don't make me send you away, I can't do it, I can't, oh gods, Liriel, why...” He held her to him, crying himself, just the two of them weeping in each other's arms until finally neither had the energy to continue.
“What did I do,” Madanach whispered. “Who did I offend, what god did I upset, did I displease Sithis, is that why he took my girls? I had four of them, Liriel, four and they were so perfect and beautiful from the day they left their mother's womb. And they're all gone, I lost them all. Eithne, killed by that Stormcloak bastard. Amaleen, killed protecting her littlest sister. She'd wandered off from the camp, I think she might have been trying to get to Markarth to visit me in prison, but she was only eight, she barely knew what direction the city was in. Amaleen found her, but some Nord mercenaries found them too. Carved Amaleen into pieces while her sister watched. She'd hidden herself, the Nords never found her. But she was never the same again. She was out there for hours, cold, hungry, frightened – they say she got so hungry she ended up taking bites out of her sister's body. I don't know whether to believe that or not, but my poor girl, my little Eola...”
Everything in Liriel's brain came screaming to a halt as the pieces slotted into place. Eola. His youngest daughter was called Eola. Eola who Argis had looked very intrigued by and actually said she reminded him of someone, in fact he'd even recognised the name. They even looked similar. Of course, it was possible there were quite a few Eolas in the Forsworn... but Liriel had heard the story of Amaleen's death before and not from Madanach. From Eola, who despite having lost faith in the Forsworn, had never lost her faith in the King in Rags, had stared up at him in Markarth with the same adoration Liriel had felt. Eola who'd had issues with both her mother and the Matriarch of Karthspire, and now Liriel realised the two were one and the same. Eola who'd spent her childhood feeling overshadowed by Kaie – easily explained if the two were sisters. Eola who said her father was the only one who'd ever loved her unconditionally and while Liriel had thought he'd been killed, Eola had never used that word. She'd said the Nords took him, that he was gone. The Nords had killed her sisters, but only taken her father. To Cidhna Mine.
Re: Nightshade and Juniper 19.11
Date: 2013-07-09 09:24 pm (UTC)“Tell me about her,” Liriel whispered. “Tell me about Eola. You never did say what happened, you didn't even tell me her name until now.”
“Why'd you want to know now?” Madanach asked, sounding more than a little baffled.
“Just tell me,” Liriel said softly, nestling in his arms. “If – if we have to part... I want to know the last piece of the story before I go.”
She felt Madanach's arms tighten and a kiss on her head.
“Well, why not, it's not like it can hurt any worse than the rest of all this,” he sighed. “All right. You know how she saw Amaleen die. Well, it changed her. She'd always been closer to me than her mother and I know Mireen resented that. Mireen was not a good woman – she blamed me for not saving Eithne, and I think she blamed Eola for not saving Amaleen, or at least being the reason she died. Either way, she took it out on Eola, and managed to combine overprotectiveness with constant belittling. The way Kaie told it, Eola always seemed to be the naughty one, the stubborn one, the one who talked back, the one who invited trouble. Well of course she was, she was my girl through and through. I never knew when to shut up either.” Laughter at this, every word shot through with pride and really Liriel had to wonder how she'd not seen the relationship before. “Anyway, that's how it was and things got worse as she got older. She threw herself into her training, did really well by all accounts, was shaping up to be one of our best nightblades. Gifted, they called her. Never seen anything like it, so I heard. Better than her sister in a lot of ways. She had my gift for Destruction, her mother's Conjuration talents, could sneak like a Dark Sister, handled a blade like veterans twice her age. I was so proud, couldn't wait for her to turn sixteen, get initiated and then come do the jail runs with her sister so I could finally see my girl again. But it never happened.”
“She died?” Liriel asked, all the while knowing that no, she never died, she ran away. Deserted, according to Eola. A common deserter, so Liriel had thought, but no, she was the long-lost Reach-Princess. In danger of a brutal and fatal punishment, so Liriel had been led to believe. Punishment?? From the sound of it, Eola was no more likely to die a long, slow lingering death at Madanach's hands than Liriel was ever likely to. All the same, Liriel needed to make sure that Madanach would actually take her back with open arms.
“Worse,” said Madanach softly. “She ran away. Mireen's fault. She stopped Eola's initiations, confined her to camp, refused to let her make the sacrifice for her initiation of Sithis, and banned anyone in the camp from going near her to consummate Anu's. Said she wasn't getting recognised as an adult until she'd learned to act like one, and that meant getting married to continue the line. She'd already starting making arrangements with eligible men at other camps. Apparently Mireen doubted Eola's commitment to the cause and thought it would be best to get Eola married and pregnant as soon as possible to tie her down. Married by force and at sixteen! She was a child, Liriel, my child!” Madanach was shaking as he spoke, voice harsh and furious and Liriel began to realise why he'd not mourned Mireen's death. She'd have found it hard to forgive a husband who'd try to sell one of her girls in marriage.
“So she escaped,” Liriel whispered, her respect for Eola shooting up. “Good for her.”
Re: Nightshade and Juniper 19.12
Date: 2013-07-09 09:26 pm (UTC)“You don't see her as a deserter or murderer then,” Liriel said, hope flaring. Madanach looked at her, surprised she'd ever think that.
“No, why would I? She was a child, Liriel! Uninitiated. Never taken a life, never been with anyone, not started the Dance as a full adult. I'm not going to hold her to account for what she did as a child. She was alone and afraid and didn't know any better or have any other options. Because I wasn't there to look after her and stop it.”
Guilty, bitter, blaming himself – but not angry. Not vengeful. Eola would be safe – more than safe. Loved.
“What would you say if you saw her again?” Liriel whispered. Madanach didn't reply, and Liriel looked up to see tears in his eyes. “Madanach? Oh gods, Madanach, you don't have to answer that...”
“She was my girl,” Madanach whispered, not looking at Liriel as he clung on to her. “My little princess. All the others were born at Karthspire but not her. She was born in Markarth, in the master bedroom at Understone Keep, while I was King the first time. When she was born, I took her out to the waiting city and told her she would have everything I could ever give her, she'd want for nothing, she'd have the life I never did. A promise I could never keep. I failed her, Liriel. I loved her so much and I let her down. She needed me and I wasn't there...” He clutched Liriel to him, face buried in her hair, silent tears on his cheeks.
“I'm not sure I even want to see her again,” Madanach murmured. “Don't know what I'd say. How in the world I'd ever make it up to her, I don't know. I don't suppose she wants to see me again – she must have heard about me taking the Reach by now, if she cared, she'd have come back. But she hasn't so I guess she's done with us.”
Liriel wasn't sure whether to be impressed by his stoicism or outraged at him just giving up. She let go of him, sitting upright.
“Madanach, she's your daughter!” Liriel cried. “More than that, with Kaie gone she's your heir! You can't just give up on her! You have to find her. I'm not having any child of mine at constant risk of disinheritance, and nor will any Reachwoman you might marry.”
That did get to him, the familiar spark firing up with anger in his eyes.
“And where do you suggest I look, hmm? She could be anywhere! Morrowind, High Rock, Cyrodiil, who knows where she went? For all I know she went off to study magic with your lot in Alinor.”
“They'd never teach a human magic,” Liriel laughed. “Goes against everything the Thalmor believe.” She leaned over and kissed him, her lips meeting his as she held his face and tasted him one last time.
“Don't do anything,” she whispered. “Don't make any hasty decisions. Just keep yourself safe and take care of the Reach. Get your son married. Don't think about heirs or finding a bride or anything. Just leave it to me.”
Re: Nightshade and Juniper 19.13
Date: 2013-07-09 09:28 pm (UTC)“I am Listener of the Dark Brotherhood, Archmage of Winterhold and Dragonborn,” Liriel replied, brimming with confidence at last. “I've got friends all over the place. I can find her, Madanach. I can get you your daughter back.”
“Don't make promises you can't keep,” Madanach warned her, but that was hope in his eyes, faint hope but hope nonetheless. He watched as she got up, reaching for her things.
“I can give you a year,” he finally said. “That's all, Liriel. I'm getting old, I can't wait forever.”
“I know,” Liriel said softly, shouldering her pack. It wouldn't take a year, it wouldn't even take a month if her intuition was correct. She just needed to hear the truth from Eola and persuade her to go back to her father.
Pausing to kiss Madanach goodbye, she left the tent, in search of Argis. Time to get her ex-housecarl's opinion, reclaim Cicero and then... then it was time to go find a princess.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A/N: The Forsworn funeral owes a lot to the Fremen funeral service in Dune, with a few Dothraki elements from Game of Thrones and Forsworn/Elder Scrolls lore mixed in to give it that canon feel. I hope you liked it.
Eola must be the least likely princess ever, but I have a feeling she'd go well as kin to Madanach. She's not going to tell him about the cannibalism and Namira worship though. Even Madanach has limits.
Re: Nightshade and Juniper 19.13
Date: 2013-07-12 01:42 pm (UTC)And I'm with Liriel- I totally should have seen that Eola was Madanach's daughter but I didn't.