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Player!DB - Anything Goes

Date: 2014-01-02 12:37 am (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
That's right. We're breaking the game here and you're the DB. We've all thought about it.

Maybe you would make some suggestions to Sanguine about what you two should do on your night out on the town. Maybe you talk about leveling up to your confused housecarl. Maybe you pull an Adoring Fan on your favorite character. Maybe you're brave enough to teach Cicero a new song ("When You're Evil," anyone?) Maybe you memorized all the Shouts and don't need Mora's help, prompting negotiations.

By its nature, crack one-shots preferred, but any and everything is game.
From: (Anonymous)
Author's Note: I happen to love Voltaire's "When You're Evil" (thank you, OP!) and loved the idea of the prompt of the Listener teaching the song to Cicero. Hence the following. The words are from the above song--with a little alteration. Only a little. Please, enjoy.

"When You're...Evil?" 1/1

Nazir frowned, rising from the table where he’d been reading missives from across Tamriel. He had thought he heard—singing? Not Cicero’s demented singing. No, this had sounded like the Listener.

But the Listener did not sing. And she certainly did not sing about…being evil?

“Now, Cicero, if you sing with me, I’ll give you this wonderful, luscious sweet-roll,” purred the velvety voice of the Listener from the other room. How could the promise of a pastry sound like something so much more lascivious, wondered Nazir, reaching down to adjust himself.

“But…Listener…the song is…” came the whine of the Jester-clad madman.

The Listener chuckled—it sounded so dark and malevolent that Nazir felt something stir within himself. “Twisted, my lovely Keeper. And oh so perfect for our Brotherhood. Please? For me?” Nazir could practically imagine the doleful look that the Listener was casting towards Cicero—the quivering lip was always a nice touch, the Redguard thought.

A deep sigh from the Keeper. “Very well, Listener.” He sounded oddly sane –to be fair, Cicero was far more sane around the Listener than anyone else. Maybe because she was a bit mad herself.

“Now together. I’ll teach you my favorite part—you’ll like it, I promise you, Cicero. We’ll even change some of the words to better fit it to the Brotherhood. Now, one, two, three. ‘I'm the fear that keeps you waked. I'm the shadows on the wall. I'm the monsters they become. I'm the nightmare in your skull. I'm a dagger in your back. And extra turn upon the rack. I'm the quivering of your heart. A stabbing pain, a sudden start.’” A quick giggle from the Listener had Nazir leaning forward. “Now for the refrain, my lovely Keeper,” crooned the Listener and Nazir could imagine the luscious Listener crawling into the Keeper’s lap. “’And it's so easy when you're evil. This is the life, you see. Lord Sithis tips his hat to me. I do it all because I'm evil. And I do it all for free. Your tears are all the pay I'll ever need.’”

Nazir swallowed, settling back in his chair. He had to admit, the song did fit the Brotherhood.

“Now, dear sweet Cicero, here’s your sweet-roll, as promised. Oh, and Nazir?” called the voice of the Listener as she padded away from the happily chomping Keeper and into view of the chocolate-skinned Speaker.

Nazir looked up at the curvy woman standing atop the stone stairs. “Yes, my Listener?”

She chuckled, crooking a finger at him in the universal signal of ‘come here.’ “Would you like me to teach you the rest of the song? It does get SO lonely being evil.”
From: (Anonymous)
You just made my day, Anon! This little fill was perfect! OP gives two thumbs up, and a few extras!

Boot to the Head

Date: 2014-04-09 05:01 am (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
(Because we were all so, so frustrated by Season Unending.)

Dragons were rash and temperamental. Really, they should have expected this after her reaction to Elenwen and a lengthy apology for swearing so much inside High Hrothgar.

Well, she could see how throwing her boot at Ulfric's head when he threatened to walk out might have been a bit much. Yes, she knew all about his horrible backstory (and did, in fact, feel bad for him because of it), but the whole thing was pretty childish.

Ulfric ducked out of the way and gave her a very confused look. "Did you just...throw your boot at me?"

"If you don't sit your cranky Nordic ass down, I'm throwing the other one." She turned to Arngeir, "And one again, I apologize for my language."

After a few moments of stunned silence, he sat down.

A while passed, and finally, finally, her least favorite quest was over. Well, almost over, there was just one more bit of dialogue. And then she remembered what that dialogue was.

"Well, what about you, Elisf? Are these terms to your liking? Speak up-"

He didn't dodge the other boot.

Re: Boot to the Head

Date: 2014-04-09 01:09 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
I'm just sitting here laughing my butt off, A!A! Sweetrolls to you and thank you for filling!

Dragon Ladies have terrible tempers

Date: 2014-04-27 12:04 am (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
The tiny bosmer elf swore in both The common tongue and her own lyrical language, throwing down a 2000 septim bow like it was a mere longbow while her companion snickered before diving to the side as she attempted to set his pants on fire. She sighed and shouldered the weapon before setting out.

"Favor the bow eh? I'm a sword man myself!" One of the guards commented, causing her brow to twitch at the sight of a massive steel warhammer on said guard's back.

"You're the Companion's newest member? So you what, fetch mead or something?" Deep breaths. Her companion was starting to get rather worried and she normally loved to hear his jokes! Especially the one about the guy with a wife who looked like a horker.

"Out of my way milk drinker." Oh dear. He sighed as the woman he followed told the idiot not to mess with her. She wasn't that intimidating in a matching Motley, but he knew better. She was the Listener after all. It was over in the blink of an eye, her twin blades striking him down in seconds before she put them away and walked off.

"Is Listener okay?" He asked tentatively, following faithfully as a puppy and eager to please. She looked at him with her golden eye and smiled, holding out her hand, "I feel much better now that I was able to kill someone without having to pay annoying fines. Let's go complete a contract for mother."

Re: Dragon Ladies have terrible tempers

Date: 2014-05-06 04:08 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
Thank you for your fill! I think we've all been there, definitely!

RE: Player!DB - Anything Goes

Date: 2017-05-05 05:36 am (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
Omw, I need to do this!

Ulfric x F!DB, first person, humorish, romance.

"So, you're saying that where you come from, we are presented as a thing of fiction?" Ulfric chuckled. "I almost can't imagine it."

"Yep! They talk about how much you hate, or don't hate, the dunmer. They talk about your past, they talk about your future, possibly with the dragonborn. One even depicted you as being the second coming of Pelagius the Mad." I scowled.

"What did you write of me," he asked.

"Nothing!" I blushed. "Nothing at all. Certainly nothing about you dominating a High Elf or rescuing Elisif, or anything like that!"

He laughed merrily.

"Did you ever see pictures, like the ones inside certain volumes of the Sultry Argonian Maid," he asked.

"Yep," I blushed. "I'm pretty sure they were all of you with other males, though..."

I looked a bit downcast at this. He caught on, smiling gently, but with laughter still on his lips.

"You do realize that I'm right here in front of you, right?"

I looked at him carefully to ascertain he was not joking. He wasn't. He set our drinks aside, bent me back, and kissed me. Well, I could die happy now.

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